If You Write It, They Will Read

Today is the last day of the 7 Posts in 7 Days challenge.  I'm glad I participated despite the panic about running out of material by the second day!  All I can say about that is that it's a good thing I don't make a living out of writing.  My family will starve LOL.

This blog has a small audience consisting mainly of friends and family.  When I write it is with the idea that those who are reading are familiar with my quirks and hear the laughter in the LOL.    With the spike in traffic due to the 7 posts challenge I wondered how a personal blog such as mine would attract someone (who do not personally know me) to subscribe.

My blogging style has always been self- indulgent.  I write, press publish, then let go.  That explains the grammar or spelling mistakes that I don't re-read and correct.  I hardly ever bother with stats unless it's coming from some referrer spam.  I did notice when the posts about Insanity seem to be the most popular.  Other than that I write for the sheer indulgence. 

So what have I learned with the daily posts?  Well, for one it's hard to find the time.  Two, it's hard to find a topic to write about for seven straight days. Three, committed to write everyday, finding the time and topic actually cease to be a problem.  You just do it. 

Thank you to those who put up with me this whole week,  including my husband LOL.  For those of you coming from Conversion Diary, welcome and please stay?!  :-)

My next posts will be coming from Canada as I travel with my oldest two for my dad's funeral.  Please pray for all of us this week!

Family Reunion

Today was my husband's family reunion on his dad's side.  My now deceased father-in-law was the youngest of five, he is survived by three siblings, five kids, a gazillion grand children and countless nieces and nephews.  When he was alive his house (where we live now) was the normal place to have these family gatherings.  Once a year he had what's called a "turnover party" where he makes his world famous cottage cheese turnovers.  Today we didn't have turnovers and the party wasn't at our house.  It was held at my husband's cousin's beautiful property.  My husband warned me that once I get there I will covet it, not just the house but the property and he was right.  I'll let the pictures do the talking...

entering the beautiful property

the GPS doesn't lie, we're in the middle of nowhere and that's exactly where I want to live

the oldest and the youngest of the Jerry grand kids

there were so many of us we had to have name tags, here the five-year-old writes his own

there's a lake where one can swim and go boating

beautiful afternoon after the rain

the kids wasted no time jumping in the water

the husband takes me on a boat ride...

while the girl swims right beside us

Molly jumping in

the youngest being spoiled by cousins

a serious game of dodgeball - kids vs. adults

the final two - the middle child and my husband's cousin Joanie

the baby looks on from inside the car

ripples on the water as the boys skip rocks

my attempt at a panoramic shot of this 23-acre heaven

I could live here

my children did not want to leave

another view of the lake

roasting marshmallows

middle child goofing off as the girl climbs up the steps in the background

you know you have a big family when you have to rent a porta-john for reunions LOL

me with cake, husband with floaties

a beautiful sunset to cap off a beautiful day

Insanity Revisited

It's supposed to be the third week of the second round of Insanity.  After the first round I took a much needed break to enjoy real life without sweating buckets everyday. It was during that break week that I noticed the most change probably because my body was no longer swollen from the punishment LOL.

I relished every day of that week, enjoying the weight-loss and tighter muscles.  I drank beer, ate chocolate and most of all I did not exercise beyond the household chores/running after children.  It was great, I felt so accomplished.

Round two, week one was also great. As expected it was easier as the challenging parts did not make me cry anymore.  There was a lot of sweating while I still struggled through some of the drills.  It's neat, though, to see how much I've progressed.  I had very low expectations of myself when we first started doing this fitness program.  Wanting to do a second round is almost miraculous in itself!

The supposed second week came to a screeching halt after I found out my dad passed away.  My body couldn't move, paralyzed by grief. I couldn't eat, I hardly slept and exercising was totally out of the question.I knew there was not going to be a third week either.  The stress of planning an immediate trip to Canada continued the pattern of not eating well or sleeping enough.

I'm trying to feed myself better so I can get back to the point where there's enough fuel in me to exercise.  I miss the adrenaline high, I miss the sense of accomplishment, I miss the sense of well-being.  I hope to re-start Insanity after my trip home.

My Life's Motto

Yesterday I alluded to one of my favorite life lessons as I discerned with the Poor Clares.  After searching through the archives I found the original entry in one of my Christmas daybook posts aptly titled Our Finest Gifts We Bring.

If you've read this before you may skip to tomorrow's post, tomorrow :-) 

I am seriously pondering...that moment many years ago when my then 4-year-old cried after listening to the Little Drummer Boy.  He was saddened that the drummer boy had nothing to give the baby Jesus.  I have felt similarly many times in my life that I suffer the same fate - that there is nothing (good) for me to give this God who gives me everything.  Just then I am reminded of this little story I tell people (too) often - when I was discerning a vocation to the monastic life. Mother Abbess, in her infinite wisdom, told me that the monastery is not a hiding place, we only find there what we bring. And it is so in life, isn't it, you find what you bring.  These words still save me from a life of pity-parties. So say a few Ave's for me as I (struggle and) strive each day to bring the Lord my finest gifts - the fruits of my calling as mother, wife, friend, sister, daughter and child of God. 

Go For The Grace

Prior to marriage and children I was discerning a monastic vocation.  I was young, in-love with Christ and confused, I mean the latter in a good way.  In the old country I discerned with the Poor Clares where one of the most enduring advice was given to me*

Fast forward to a couple of years later in Canada, I discerned with a group of women with no particular religious order in mind.  I became really good friends with a young girl (younger than me) who felt called to be a Benedictine nun.  We were in the Legion of Mary together.  She belonged to a different praesidium but every so often I attended their meetings then we would go out for coffee to chat.  She had the funniest stories about nuns she had met as she went on these vocation discernment retreats.  It really made alive  the faith for me and the joy that a monastic vocation seem to mask from the rest of the world.

One of my favorite stories is when she purposely skipped the Sacrament of Reconciliation one week.  The novice mistress walked up to her asking why she's not lining up at the confessional.  She said "Sister, I just went to Confession last week!".  Novice mistress, with a smile on her face then replied "good, go again anyway, go for the grace!"

Each time I get that lofty feeling of feigned holiness I remind myself of her story.  It is also a lesson in humility echoing the sentiment of St. Therese of Lisieux in recognition that "everything is grace" (Her Last Conversations p.57)

When my friend finally entered the Benedictines at the Abbey of St. Walburga, we said our sad goodbyes with a promise of prayers and letters as the abbey would allow. We've lost touch through the years, each of us settling into a life that we both discerned God willed for us.  I have absolutely no doubt that she is joyful in her life as I am in mine.  As I tremble at approaching the Sacrament of Reconciliation I recall that blessed friendship and those encouraging words - go for the grace!

*there is an entry on my old blog about this enduring advice story but for the life of me can't find it! I'll re-post when I find it.

You Know You're Desperate....

for blog entry ideas when you actually have to google "fun blog entry ideas".  It's only been the second day of 7 Posts in 7 Days and I already need help LOL.  The reality is I have 501 ideas for blogging but they all sound either cliche or boring.  So that leads me to think about who I'm writing for.

In my early days of blogging I only wrote for me, it was (and still is) self-indulgent and care-less.  Midway through it sort of became a platform for a couple of things that are important to me (mostly Catholicism and homeschooling) so I mostly wrote for that audience. Now it's just a free for all, I'm writing again for me pursuing whatever my brain allows me to be processed into coherent words.

Today I was thinking of writing something different, maybe even unexpected of me?  Hence, the googling of "fun blog entry ideas".  Whatever fun ideas I get I'll be sure to write it here. In the meantime, what possessed me to join a week-long writing challenge is something I will never understand.

Day 2 down, five more to go :-)

source

I Write Because I Am

When Jen Fulwiler of Conversion Diary issued the 7 Posts in 7 days challenge I decided to sign up on a whim. I figure I could use a pick-me-up on these foggy days of grieving the loss of my dad.  Even before the world of blogs I was a journal keeper.  Writing was my way of dealing with things I couldn't deal with especially in my teen years. It was also how I practiced newly acquired vocabulary as English wasn't my first language. 

Before writing my first love was reading.  A voracious reader in my small third world village with no nearby library meant I read anything and everything, shampoo labels, comics, old magazines, anything that I could get my hands on with printed letters was fair game.  The more I read the more I wrote.  The more I wrote the more I pondered.  The more I pondered the less I am able to express myself outside of writing.  It's the typical story of a born introvert.

Unlike blog writing personal journals do not have restraint, at least mine did not.  Still, when I read my old journals I cringe at some of the entries that did not display virtue, tact or sanity.  I have often thought of destroying the not so pretty years but then interlaced with them are amazing memories I don't want to forget.  It's real life chronicled - the good, the bad and the ugly.

I haven't thought much about what to blog about this week but I am looking forward to the challenge.  It's fun to write when you don't have to edit for perfection.

Come back tomorrow!

SOURCE

My Dad

It's been a difficult week.  This past weekend I received news that my dad passed away in Canada.  It was sudden, he wasn't in the best of health but we didn't expect it to be this soon.  We had plans to spend Christmas together in Texas where my sister lives.

It's hard to lose your remaining parent.  My mom passed away five years ago, my husband has also lost both his parents.  My dad was the last connection our children had to "the past".

It's hard to write about him, a complex human being that brings out complex emotions in my heart.  He was a good man, a good husband, a good dad, a good "lolo" (grandpa).  He was funny, bright, ambitious, a pillar/pioneer and a highly- respected figure in our small community back in the old country.  He taught us to value the finer things in life despite our poverty.  He was always impeccably dressed.  He wanted us, in his own words, to be better than him.  He was our first English language teacher as he required us to talk to him only in English when we were younger.  And how that helped me in life especially in high school!  English was always my best subject (don't ask about the rest! LOL), all thanks to my dad.

He had a very simple faith.  He prayed the rosary everyday. The first thing he does in the morning is to pray.  He prays for anything, everything and everybody.  It used to amuse me to hear all these things he prays for (he's a very vocal pray-er).  The funny thing is now I find myself doing the same thing - praying for anything, everything and everybody.

I have so many fond memories of him, the kind that words cannot describe.  The not-so-fond memories are par for the course for any father-daughter relationship.  He is not perfect, no one is.  As much as I would like to relegate him amongst the saints in heaven, I have to abide by the eschatological teaching of the Church. And to that end I continue to pray for his eternal salvation.

I'm currently going through photos album, digital and otherwise.  Here are some of my faves:

Thank you tatay for the memories! We love you so much.

feeding Pablo

he loved his grandkids

playing with the kids

with the girl

with the oldest who is now almost 12 years old

12/ Year - June

June's installment of the monthly photo diary.  Life revolved around baseball and flowers.  When you're done here head on over to Praying for Grace and visit our gracious host Barb.

the attack of the dragon - this is how he survives baseball season, toys, toys, toys

lightsaber fight with a friend

he sleeps through it all

sweet smelling roses

I just had to cut some and bring the fragrance inside

an anniversary surprise - yes, we celebrated our wedding anniversary at the baseball field

the sweet treats- a decadent chocolate cake with the number 13 and a bag of dark chocolate trouffles

 

homeschooling mamas at our end of school year party, i don't have a picture of all the kids, lets just say the average number of children for each mama is probably 4 or 5, you get the picture

at the fruit loops necklace station

at the church festival

our summer home in the baseball fields

an ominous sky that brought rain which cancelled a game

lavender

harvested to dry

the youngest playing on a low branch as i laze in my favorite perch under the tree

unsure about the new glasses

more roses

a perfect evening for a fire

singing kumbaya or not :-)

warming their hands

dance party!

what's summer without a sprinkler?!

getting buried in legos

the oldest pitching

opening a surprise package from Texas

wishes do come true, she wanted baking stuff she got baking stuff

trial run of the cake pop/doughnut hole maker

this was about five minutes after she received the package, she just had to bake

yum!

 So life did not really just revolve around baseball :-)  See you next month!