Dear Younger Me

"Let the wise also hear and gain in learning, and the discerning acquire skill "- Proverbs 1:5

Today's Write31Days writing prompt is "the advice you would give your younger self".  When I first read this prompt I thought this would be fun to write.  But the longer I thought about it the more discouraged I became. Not because there was nothing to write but because there is too much!  Too many lessons I wish I didn't have to learn and too many things I wish I didn't have to re-live.  So what was supposed to be a fun post became quite the introspection the magnitude of which I did not expect.  

What younger self to write to? Teens? Twenties? Thirties?  In a few years I could be writing about my younger forties self!  Now that is truly sobering.  Anyhow, if I were to write to my younger self, I would tell me to lighten up.  Even at a very young age I was always introspective with a tendency to overthink everything.  I think part of the reason for that is that I had to take on responsibilities at a young age so I had to act more mature than I truly was. I  had to behave older than my chronological age.  And even on those brief carefree moments I allowed myself there was a guilt inside that nagged at me.  I wasn't a very fun young person lol.

Through the years my more laid back, fun-loving nature eventually emerged.  I can't pinpoint a specific moment or event that led to this eventual change.  I think the years of growing, learning from other people, looking outside of myself, growing in faith, and wanting to make myself better has helped bring about the change. I still have moments when I can get pretty intense, I don't think I will be completely free of it but I try not to stew on it longer than necessary.  It gets tiring and my energies are better spent in choosing joy and allowing room for the Holy Spirit to do his work.  

What advice would you give your younger self? Now go and visit my friends who are keeping me company this month - Autumn, Nicole, Barb, and Christine.

at the beach with family and friends, I think I was 18 or 19 in this picture